looks ;)

'If you look at them separately,
such as my eyes, my nose,
and my nouth, they are not bad.
When you put them together,
its just okay.'
-Mark Lee, on his looks

完美vs缺陷

这个世界没有完美.
如果你能包容不完美，
这个世界就会是完美.

-really?-

<你没想象中爱我>

你小心翼翼牵我手
其实是担忧藏不住我
自尊也投降活在她之下
我好傻

你字字句句说你不爱她
那又是什么让你害怕
我疑惑但是原谅因为你留下
我好傻

不是我不说就不在意空等候
原来你没想象中那么爱我
我不懂该拿什么安慰我的难受
你的存在让我更寂寞

你寸步不离像天使的她
挥霍我的爱从不放心上
我有一丝无奈也有一些明白
该放开

不是我不说就不在意空等候
原来你没想象中那么爱我
我不能再从你的怀抱感觉到什么
不爱我别再说假装爱那是撒盐在伤口

嗬~~谁说我不在意空等候
原来你从来都没深刻爱我
我才懂不是我不心痛
其实是心没了感受

呜~~
你没想象中爱我

你没想像中爱我

u.perfect.cut

过去的批评嘲讽 Let it go Let it go
过去的轻蔑冷落 Let it go Let it go
有些人口不饶人 却忘了瞧瞧自己
又有什么资格

时刻都善良待人 Let’s move on Let’s move on
时刻都做好本分 Let’s move on Let’s move on
有些人心思浅薄 绝不是宽容
自暴自弃的理由

也许 确实也受过言语打击
也许 因此而失去了自信心
但千万别将勇气深锁在阴影里
我们又不会妨碍这世界（的）美丽

我知道我变漂亮了
我知道我被注意了
曾难过 失落
微笑一下就过
外在的美貌容易戳破
内在的美好细水长流

我知道我变漂亮了
我知道我也豁达了
不自卑 不埋怨
就算还差一点点
用内涵弥补一切缺陷
内在的美 迷住每个人的眼

一切完美

philosophical

melissa: your blog very philosophical,
cannot understand/know you better.

-really?-

equations.

happiness = reality / expectation
hope = expectation / reality

[adapted from 19 minutes
by Jodi Picoult]

.完美.

你眼里的完美， 就一定是完美？
你看不见的完美，就一定是不完美？

attraction

someone said: 'you will attract weird people
and they are usually ones that you wont like'


[i'm not telling you know my thoughts ;)
try your luck on msn ;) ]

-!?!-

superWOMAN

i totally SALUTE her!

she's a woman with her career,
loving, caring, always
giving us all that she has,
in nuturing us-students,

she is a mother of two,
her love for her seemingly
genetically imperfect children,
her strength as the emotional
pillar of her family,
the courage and strength
that steam through
her petite figure
as she faced the hard facts.
her determination to
walk this road
that others see it-impossible.

to you,
i give you my utmost
respect and admiration.


-jia you! my superwoman!-



[delicated to my '07 ny GP tutor]

差传

今天教会举行年度差传年会，
不禁，让我想起06年泰北短宣。
这里有些照片与大家分享；）















children at the camp we organised.
(mostly farmers' children, Akka race)















the winners of the volleyball match.
they are my students too. totally <3 them!
(btw, they can speak chinese)














2006 Thailand mission trip, team members.
( Thailand, ChiangMai,ChiangRai, Pan Doi)
Grp Leader, 1st row, from left 3rd and 4th,
Maybelline, Zhong Jie




HuiZhongPo NanTa Kindergarten children,
singing and dancing to the hymns / songs
(go figure the title of the songs)


2006 - i went
2007 - there wasnt any
2008 - I WANT TO GO!!!

Perfect Match

i recently just finished reading this
novel by Jodi Picoult.

there's a reason why i chose this
book cover, because, i love
the way he stares, like there are
deep thoughts in him.

Synopsis :
As a assistant district attorney, Nina Frost
prosecutes the sort of crimes that tear
families apart. but when Nina and her
husband discovers that their 5-year old
son Natheniel has been sexually abused,
it is her own family that is deverstated.
The world Nina inhabits now seems different
from the one she lived in yesterday;
the lines between family and professional
life are erased; and answers to questions
she thought she knew are no longer easy
to find. Overcome by anger and desperate
for vengeance, Nina ignites a battle that
may cause her to lose the very thing
she's fighting for.

Review:
I'm not a mother myself,
maybe i cant emphasize just
as well, but Jodi keeps you
questioning yourself through
out the novel, 'if i were Nina,
will i do it the same way?'
'is Nina the hero or not?'
Besides, the many plot twist
keeps you reading from
cover to cover, and even
when you have finished it,
you will look back, and admire
the characters for their
courage, for the bravery,
for the love they hold
so dear to their hearts.

Nina Frost - I admire her as
the mother, who, in the name
of Natheniel's protector,
will go to the extremes to
protect her 'life'-Natheniel.
Yet sometimes, you really 'hate' her,
and wished she just shut-up,
bacause the reader knows
she is wrong this time round,
she does not know what's
the best, but yet she
insists that she does!

Caleb Frost - This is one character
that i really love, through out the
novel, he seems like he din't care,
he appears like he never approved
to his wife's actions, he will do anything
just to stay away from this 'monster'
that has overtook his wife's form
one morning. Yet, at the end of the novel,
Jodi makes you change your
impression of this big man.
He proves his love, for his
wife, for his family,
through his silent actions.

Natheniel Frost - The little boy who
is more mature than other kids his age,
because of what happened
to him. Picoult carefully crafted every
detail of Natheniel so that readers could
see the incident through the eyes of this
5-year old, and understand his thoughts.
Moreover, Jodi also use Natheniel's
thoughts to question the theme and
key issues brought up.
Nina: 'Natheniel, you did something wrong,
but you are stilla good boy'
Natheniel: 'What about Gwynne?'
Nina: 'No, he did something wrong,
and he is a bad person'
Natheniel: 'What about you?'
Nina: ... (tight for an answer)

Patrick Ducharme - The police detective
in the story. This is a character i'm in a
love-hate relationship with. Love him,
because he will go the extra mile for Nina,
even if it meant that he will lose his job.
Hate him, because he always seems like a
3rd party in the little Frost family.
Seems a little extra sometimes.

On the whole, i will recommend this book,
with the rating of * * * */5*s

-go grab it!-

.幸福.

只有得到过，才知挣扎的美好，
只有失去， 才明白曾经拥有的可贵



-幸福都在记忆里-


[取自，现在，吴淡如 著]

this life...

i try sooo hard to please
YOU
i try to get into the top class,
i did it
i try to take higher chinese,
i did it
i try to get into top 10 JCs,
i did it
i try to get into the top uni,
i did it

you want me to learn piano,
i did
you want me to join choir,
i did
you want me to be pianist,
i did
you want me to not join camps,
i did
you want me to not go for prom,
i did
you want me to dress decently,
i did
you want me to give up squash,
i did
you want me to keep short hair,
i did
you want me the goody-daughter,
i did
you want me to not dye my hair,
i did
you want me to not be like other youngsters,
i did

you wanted me to give up nanyang for TJ
i stuck to my LOVE
you wanted me to give up chinese lit
i stand by my LOVE
you quitely wished i gave up art
i almost did
i feared i disgrace you,
i gave up my passion

all my life, i try too hard to PLEASE you,
but you choose only to see my flaws,
and nothing beyond that.
you are never satisfied with what you have
you always say i dont meet your expectations
but you never praised me when i really needed one
when can i just be JOANNE,
and nothing more than that?


-do the extremez-

young

in terms of body's metabolic rate:
i'm declared YOUNG!
at age 16 (for a 91 years old)

I'm.prefect

i'm toe-ing the line of perfection

i must be the perfect daughter
i must be the perfect student
i must be the perfect teacher
i must be the perfect pianist
i must be the perfect person
i must be the perfect maid
i must be the perfect girl
i must be the superwoman

what if...
one day you realised... ...
i have not gotten into the top university
i have undesireable disgusting habits
i have no flare for doing house chores
i have horrible attitudes, bad temper
i have fallen far beyond expectations
i have sucidal/murderous thoughts
i have the worst piano skills
i have absolutely no brains
i have stagnant spritual life
i have a non-christian mate... ....

everything that holds the facade
will shatter into a thousand pieces

it is so called a place where people
FORGIVE AND FORGET
but no, honesty i dont think they do.
people expect you to be the '万能膏'
they name it, at fingers snap,
you are to produce it, perfect.
they do not allow mistakes,
they say they wont laugh,
but they do, even if it was
the slightest tumble,
they wait for your fall to laugh.
they say they have forgotten,
but they have not.

everything is 'they say'
but which is reflected by their actions?





-apparent-

grace

(my mother and i came home after dinner
i forgot to bring my keys and card out)

mum: gosh! i forgot the lock the metal gate!
me: mother! doi whats the matter with you?
mum : (smiles apologetically)
me: good thing the person is you, not me,
if not i will get scolding from you,
at least you wont get it from me.
(in the house)
mum: oh my keys are on the table!
me: thank goodness! if you locked the door
we will have to sit outside and wait for a* pek
(my dad, he's gone to m'sia, coming back on mon)
to come home, but even then, his keys are at home too!


-God's Grace. He sees-

promise

[i went back to nanyang to collect my cert]

pio: if you get into MFA,
remember to give me your name card
me: that will take some years
you will wait for my news right?
pio: yup, sure, dont forget
me: handphone no. will not change?
pio: yup, and try to visit me more often
some time soon, before the year ends.




-wait for me!-

错过？

流星划过天际，我错过了许愿，
浪花拍上演时，我错过了祝福，
故事讲了一遍，我错过了聆听，
人生只有一回，我错过了什么？

sujects of interest

art,
jazz,
classical music,
science fiction,
computer,
drawing/painting,
spiritual matters,
meditation,
handicraft,
writing, (oh so <3 it!)
strategic games,
politics (ss political science!)

mirror.mirror

on the wall... tell me, tell me... ...

i stared at the reflection in the silver coating,
an unfamiliar face plastered across it,
giving away no sign of youthfulness.
only the pale skin tone,
those sunken cheeks,
chipped lifeless lips...
'smile' seems like it has never made its
way onto this foreign sovereignty.

i see nothing more,
but a 91... ....



-haggard-